Daytime Buddies and The Last Day

When I actually sit down and think about the time John and I have together each week, it's very little. I work full time from 7:30-4....workout after work...come home, quick chat, cook dinner, watch TV, sleep....he works full time, out to sea some weeks...on the weekend we're both so tired from working, we spend the day in the living room with the blinds closed watching movies.

From March 1st to about March 21 or so, we get a unique opportunity to be together all day long. John's work has slowed down, since they don't need him anymore and I won't be working.

We've decided (besides getting rid of things) we plan to work out, go see movies during the day, and just generally be productive.

Today was also my last day of work. I got a little misty-eyed giving a couple of my very best friends hugs knowing that now we're just friends instead of friend/co-workers. I sent out a silly e-mail about the "Top Ten" things I learned from my job. Everyone laughed and I told them how much I was going to miss them.

I guess I don't really feel like writing much right now. I'm so deeply sad that I'm leaving San Diego and all of these great lifelong friends. I just hope I can make friends in Japan and not be a total loner.

Tomorrow, we're going to try to sell my car. Fingers are crossed this goes well.

My apologies if this is kind of a discombobulated blog post. I really can't get my head around this yet. Maybe tomorrow.

Almost My Last Day

Well, Monday is my last day at work. Almost three years (three year mark would have been March 17), I have worked for this company. I think I'll miss the human interaction the most. It's nice knowing that some of your best friends are also your co-workers....that's a real special thing.

Pushpin stickman waves goodbye

My desk is real empty.

Anxiety

Thanks Toothpaste for Dinner

One of the terrible things about having anxiety is that is really puts blinders on your life. You become so focused on these little "pieces" that you forget there's a bigger picture....and there's not really much you can do to control the big picture, it's coming for you one way or another.

Bottom line, we're moving to Japan. Come hell or high water, we'll get our stuff, our dog, and our lives moved over the pacific ocean to a town called Yokosuka. That's what I have to focus on. I can't focus on the missteps along the way. I can't get down because things aren't going according to the calendar in my head. As immensely frustrating and jaw grinding as things might be, I have to try not to control everything, because at the end of the day I can't.

I was taking Wylee out last night and could see the city of San Diego spanning across the hills (we have a great view from our front porch) with all it's shimmery lights.....and it hit me that I only have a few more weeks to enjoy this view, to stand in this spot, to watch my dog frolic around in that patch of grass. Things are going to change.

It's funny how moments of clarity come when you least expect them. Oh, the change is coming and I can either face it being an anxious mess of a person who in an attempt to control everything ended up losing control or I can just take it as it comes and roll with the punches. It's going to happen, I need let it.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled blog. Up next, reschedule the movers (yeah, we had to cancel them) and final day of work in four working days....

Oh the FRUSTRATION.

If I could but the word "frustration" in big, bold LARGE letters, I would. Planning an international move tests the bounds of your patience. Planning it with the military tests them even further.

Frustration #1 -

The cost to have someone come and deep clean the apartment is $400. Our deposit was only $300, so why would we pay $400 to help us get $300 back? Looks like we may end up doing this terrible, terrible deep clean ourselves.

Frustration #2 -

My SOFA (military family member) passport has not come in yet. They won't release our plane tickets until I prove I have a passport. John drove all the way out to the passport office only to find out they couldn't give him any information except that my passport should arrive "soon."

Frustration #3 -

We planned the move and the movers should be coming March 14-16 (they'll confirm the day later), but our move out application isn't complete until we submit copies of our orders and a copy of my entry approval notice from Japan. The approval notice should arrive in 10 days, but we have six days to submit the information to the moving company. John is headed to talk to them now to explain our situation.

Frustration #4 -

I turned in my 30 day notice to move out, only to have the apartment people tell me that my move out date would be March 30th. For military lease breakers, they only do 30 day notices by full calendar months. So, if I had turned in my notice to move out on Feb 12th, my 30 days still would be on March 30th.

Ugh. I'm going to go scream right now. Not to mention I should probably start selling my car.

30 Day Notice to Move Out and a Sushi Lunch

View of the sunset from our patio

Our bedroom when we first moved in 3 years ago

Today I gave my 30 Day Notice to vacate my apartment. When we first moved into our apartment complex almost three years ago, it was a local outfit ran by a local asset management company. About a year after we moved in, they were sold to a bigger corporation and things started to go downhill. While the upkeep of the property and houses is still phenomenal, the one-on-one personal attention is mildly frustrating to say the least.

Once, they wouldn't let residents renew their lease for one year increments. The reason? They didn't want everyone's lease to come up for renewal at the same time. What?! So I went to the leasing office and raised Cain. The fear of getting forced into a month-to-month lease is that they can raise the rent on you anytime they feel like it as you are not "locked" into a price. So, at the leasing office (after I went berserk), they agreed to renew my lease for one year AND give me a $700 discount on the next month's rent. Not to mention every time I go into the leasing office they are horribly understaffed.

Today was no exception to the lack of personal attention. The waiting room at the leasing office was standing room only and there was only one gal attending to everyone. She took my notice of move out and my military orders and said she'd call me later. You can imagine why I'm nervous as I don't want this to turn into a situation where they claim I never gave them notice. So, I'll try to follow up with a call later today.

Also the Notice means we will be leaving our lease early (yes, the lease I fought so hard to renew for one year). As part of the Service Member Relief Act, servicemembers are allowed to break apartment and vehicle leases for certain reasons without incurring a penalty. Some morons out there think that just because you're active duty military it gives you the right to break your lease whenever you please without penalty. False. It only lets you break your lease IF you have permeant change of station (PCS) orders lasting longer than 90 days, which we do. So hopefully, the apartment complex is read up on their laws and knows about this. I'm crossing my fingers.

Today for lunch John and I had sushi. Good American sushi (influenced by the Japanese). Traditional Japanese sushi has the nori (seaweed) wrapped on the outside. When sushi was introduced in the west, they thought Westerners would find that unappealing, so they put rice on the outside. It was a decent lunch, but I should probably lay off this kind of food for awhile as I'm sure after a few months in Japan I'll be begging for a Lunchable.

A Party With Friends

Party people say "heeeey"

Well, I have six more working days before I say good-bye to my fine co-workers and friends. I mean I'll still be in San Diego, but I'll be a persona non gratis as I have so much stuff to do before heading out of town. I have made so many memories in San Diego and at my job that it really is going to be hard to say good-bye. Especially to a few people who I had grown especially fond of and close to these last three years.

After having moved several times during my adult life, I am getting used to the ole' rigmarole. Going away parties, hugs, tears, promises to keep in touch. For San Diego, though, it will be a touch harder as I think I really did meet a few life long friends during my tenure here.

For example, one of my closest friends here invited me to the beach when I had only been in San Deigo for a few weeks. I was so excitied to be invited somewhere by an actual person I must've forgotten myself....I forgot a towel and sunscreen. You can't lay out on the beach without a towel...and I fogot my sunscreen and pretended I didn't need it. My friend was kind enough to share her towel with me, without laughing in my face. However she did laugh in my face later when I was sunburned so badly I was the color of a tomato. She said she KNEW I needed sunscreen and had wondered why I said I didn't. Ha. Needless to say, my beach kit now includes a large old blanket I picked up from the thrift store and an umbrella, all of which stay in the trunk of my car for any unplanned beach trips.

Another time, a different friend wanted to take me to dinner for my birthday. We went to a small restaurant here in San Diego known for it's locally grown, organic food. On any given day their menu includes about ten items (including apps and desserts). We ended up ordering everything on the menu, piece by piece until we were stuffed. We ordered all their desserts and just pigged out. When I went to the restroom at the end of the meal, I came back to an icecream cookie sandwich with a burning candle in it. My birthday treat :)

Not to mention the numerous birthday parties, outings, trips to Vegas, and dive bar fun that's been had here. I'm really going to miss it.

The going away parties start this weekend. I have brunch planned at a friend's house that will be crammed with people I love. John is probably going to do something "guy-y" with his buddies. I want to have something in my empty apartment for really close friends....I don't know, it's a lot to plan, but I wouldn't feel right leaving without a huge sha-bang. I really do love the friends I have made here and I am going to miss them so very dearly. I know keeping in touch is always hard when life is zooming by at a million seconds....but I'm going to try my hardest not to let these friendships fade out of my life.

Hodgepodge of Random Thinkings

Today John has been texting me frequently asking questions about my information and banking information. When I ask what he's doing, his response was, "stuff." So, I can only assume he's drowning in a sea of paperwork. I've seen a lot of the forms he needs to complete and many require no less than three signatures before they can be certified.

John and I both are hoping we can schedule the movers and buy our plane tickets before the end of Feb. The vet's office called me today to confirm that Wylee's rabies immunity test did reach the lab at Kansas State University (KSU is the only civilian facility in the US authorized by the Japanese government to do these tests). Now I have to wait 25 days to have the results back.

John and I have also discussed contingency plans....one of the biggest stresses in my life is NOT knowing the worst case scenario. So, what happens if I don't sell the car? What if we don't sell the truck? What if I can't go to Japan with him right away? What if Wylee gets booted from Japan?

If we can't sell the cars, we'll end up renting a storage unit in San Jose near John's family. The cars can be stored there for the three years we will be gone. This is not an ideal option because we would be paying for cars we don't use plus paying for a storage unit. Storage units are reasonably priced when they're small, but when they need to hold a car....well, it's about $150-$250 a month.

At any rate, John and I have been tossing ideas around for "worst case scenario" events so that we are prepared for everything. It calms me down to know we have a plan in place. It would be ridiculous to assume that everything is going to go according to my perfect little wish list.

There'll be days like these

Wylee waits in anticipation for the vet

Today was a stressful day. Originally I had asked for the day off work to take care of all the things that needed to be done today, but the request was denied. Once you put in your two weeks notice, you are not allowed to take any sick or personal time, which is understood since that is time the company has given to you. However, vacation time is earned by the employee and can be used at the employer's discretion at any time. The company will either pay you out in the end (cash) or you can take the day, so either way, it's no gain/loss to them. I was told that I was needed at work to finish my duties. They couldn't spare me for one day. So I compromised and was out for a few hours in the morning.

Here was the to-do list today:

1. Take Wylee to the vet.

Wylee's preparedness is on a time line. We have to meet certain goals on certain days in order to have him ready for Japan in time. Today he got his 2nd rabies shot (exactly 15 days after the first one as specified by the Japanese government) and his rabies antibodies test to check and see if he is immune to rabies (also done 15 days after the first rabies shot). Since I didn't have the day off and John had doctors' appointments all day, Wylee also had to go into doggie day care for the day. I didn't have enough time to take him back home and then go to work. Total cost for all: $400

$ 55.00 - just the cost to talk to the vet, cost of the examination

$ 22.00 - cost of the rabies shot

$ 272.72 - cost of the antibodies test, includes them sending it to a Japanese approved lab here in the US

$30.00 - cost of doggie daycare

Grand total: $379.72

2. Stop by the eye doctor.

My new lenses that I paid $200 for came to my eye doctor's office. I had to stop by and drop off my frames. I didn't have time to stay and wait for them to fit the new lenses to my frames. So now, I am without glasses until Monday the 21st (the first day I will have to pick up my glasses). While this is not a horrible problem, it might cause me headaches for a few days.

3. Take the car to the shop.

Sure enough, right as I'm ready to sell my car a headlight goes out and something breaks underneath (not sure what). Two things I need to get fixed before I can sell my car. Also need to get a car wash and clean out the inside of my car. Need to take pictures and then plaster all selling venues with my ad. No time to do any of this today, so it has been pushed back to this weekend and Monday (which is President's Day and a company holiday).

So, am I stressed right now? Absoutely. However, something tells me this is just foreshadowing for things to come. I think once I quit my job and have about 20 days of "free" time in March, things will really start to fall into place. It's just hard juggling a full-time job while preparing for a huge international move. Bring on the next day, I say!

Two Week Countdown

Today I put in my two week notice at work. My last day will be 02/28/2011. Which means on March 1st, I once again enter the realm of unemployment.

Being a military spouse, my resume looks like a patchwork of jobs. I had my job in Washington for four years, my job in Virgina for one year, and here almost three years.

There are base jobs available in Japan (food service, clerical, bowling alley). They are nothing challenging or high paying, but they do serve to get me out of the house for a little bit everyday. I don't want to rush into a job in Japan as I need to spend the time acclimating and getting the house settled.

I'm hoping we can buy plane tickets sometime during this two weeks. Well, actually, we don't buy them, the military does, but I'm hoping we can get that settled soon. John says it's just his overseas screening and renlistment standing in the way of getting our plane tickets. He's working on both, so hopefully we should be given the okay soon.

Farewell Bunners

Bunners during his last day with us

By the time I hit "publish post", Bunners will be crated out of my life for good. I adopted Bunners from a rabbit rescue society in Seattle, Washington. He was my first real pet that wasn't a fish and that didn't belong to my parents. Rabbits are a challenge to care for because they require fresh fruits and veggies everyday, which gets expensive. They are unique pet animals and I would have loved to keep Bunners for the rest of his bunny life. I carried Bunners from Seattle, Wahington to Norfolk, Virginia, and then to San Diego, California.

Unfortunately, the cost to bring Bunners and Wylee to Japan was too much. Also, finding a place to live in Japan that accepts pet rabbits is near impossible. Finding a place with that accepts dogs will be a slight challenge.

So, Bunners has to go to a new home. After trying to find a taker for nearly a month, I was pretty down and out that I'd have to put Bunners in a shelter. Finally, a family contacted me and said they'd love to give Bunners a new home. They came and met him yesterday and it was instant love. They're coming today (any minute now) to pick him up and take him to his new forever home.

So good bye, Bunners. I love you dearly and hope that you live a happy stress free bunny life for the rest of your days.

The spot where Bunner's lived while in San Diego...now empty..

Suitable for Yokosuka

In case you can't read the doctor scratch above, it says "suitable for overseas transfer to Yokosuka." Yay! Wow was it a nerve wrecking experience. The doctor basically reviewed all my medical records with a fine tooth comb, asking me questions about old problems and medicines I was taking. While it dosen't sound intimidating, let me just say...it was...the doctor didn't exam me, she just examined what was in my records, making stops at all the other doctors' notes and asking questions I had already answered at my doctor's office when I had originally gone in to be seen. After every answer I gave, my mind raced, "Did I say something wrong? What if this is the thing that will disqualify me?" I have a pretty clean medical record, no real problems, but still....whew....

So, does this mean I am now cleared to accompany John to Yokosuka? No. It just means I passed the medical porition. I won't really know until we hear back from the Admirial's Office if I'm an a-okay for launch.

Additionally, as part of my rediness, I had to complete a "threat awareness" course offered by the military for family members going overseas. This course attempts to combine all overseas duties into one lump training. So I learned all about ducking gernades, driving with your windows up in the hot desert sun, and how I might be suprised to know that the US is not all loved around the world. The course also sparked my memory of the 1995 cynide and sarin chemical attacks on the Tokyo subway. I had forgotten all about that. Thanks, Awarness Training, for putting that back in my mind. Thanks.

However, when they got to the history portion about past attacks, I had to challenge some of their conclusions. Was the Ft. Hood shooter really a US threat? I don't think so. He was a crazy person who didn't like his job, didn't like his life, and had a crazed religious agaenda. He just snapped. Was he a threat to those around him? Yes absolutely. But a threat to the governement? Well....I guess I could debate that all day...since you know, my major is in political science.

All discourse aside, I passed the course with flying colors and here's a picture of me the proud graduate with the certificate. Yay me!

Permission to Come Aboard Admiral!

My life broken down into medical records.

Accompanying John to Japan is not something I'm entitled to nor is it a right. Actually, the Navy could really care less if I go or not. Most of the time they would prefer it if I didn't go as that means they could spend less money on transferring John there.

Some couple's even opt to split for three years. The wife will stay in the US with her family while the husband completes his tour in Japan. However, if you're a spouse like me and insist on going, they want to make sure that when you get there you and your family will not be a drain on the bases already limited resources.

Last night, John submitted a letter that will be routed to the Admiral of the base in Yokosuka requesting permission to bring me to the station. I had to complete all details about my passport and whether any further visas might be required. Is there a chance I could be denied to come with John? Yes. Is it likely? No.

Once the admiral approves me, I have to go to my medical screening (scheduled for tomorrow morning). They want to make sure I have no ongoing medical problems that will be a drain on their resources in Yokosuka. For example if you or your children have, diabetes, upcoming knee surgery, or manic depression --- all may be grounds for the spouse to be denied accompanying the service member. Another reason for outright denial? Pregnancy. That's right. If you're pregnant, you must remain in the US until after you have the baby, then you can join your service member in Japan.

There is large Navy hospital in Yokosuka, but they only provide limited care (such as preventive care and emergency care). They are not equipped for long term care. I know that there are state-of-the-art Japanese hospitals but 1) do you want to be treated long term by someone who is not fluent in the same language as you? and 2) how do you plan on getting Japanese health care? I'm pretty sure it's a lengthy formidable process.

Tomorrow is the medical screening for me. I don't have a reason to think anything will go wrong, but by nature I'm a worrier. So, of course I'm worried. Do I have all the right paperwork? Will I be denied because I marked "yes" on the form that I have hay fever allergies? How much convincing will I have to do to prove to them that I'm not on any thyroid medication since half my thyroid was removed when I was in high school?

Also, below is a picture of my desk at work. On Monday (Valentine's Day), I put in my two weeks notice. My workload is slowly dwindling away. Once in this spot, many files were stacked halfway up the wall.....

I have to re-do this form...

In order to bring beloved Fido (in this case, Wylee) into Japan, one of the first steps is to complete the form entitled:

"Application for import Inspection of Dogs Under the Rabies Prevention Law and the Domestic Animal Infections Diseases Control Law"

I kid you not, this is the entire name of the form.

Time to digress a little.....I allow myself one "cheat" website in which I read all about other people like me living in Japan RIGHT NOW...specifically people living in Yokosuka RIGHT NOW. As stated in a previous blog post, I don't actively seek out information about moving to Yokosuka, simply because I want all my experiences to be "untainted" by the bad experiences or good experience of others. However, in this day and age, completely cowering under a rock never did anybody any good, because chances are I'll miss a lot of good information. My "cheat" website is japanbases.com. While it might not be of much interest to anyone, the people on that forum are helpful and have a lot of good information. Although some of it is a little dumb like, "Can I have the names to all the bars and clubs in Japan? My husband is going there alone and I just want to keep track of him..."

Now, back to the form. One of the things the people on this forum repeat is to make sure you have your pet paperwork in order before arriving in Japan. This ain't America! Where sometimes someone kind of heart might make an exception because you're missing a signature on one page. NO! The Japanese are sticklers for paperwork and official business. So in order to avoid any delays, all paperwork should be in impeccable order.

So, I messed up on my first go-round with this form and I hesitate to white or scratch out anything...so new form it is...then I mail it to Japan and they e-mail me with any further questions...and then they issue me an approval notice to carry the pet into Japan...but only as far as the airport.

For some fun reading, here's a blog taste from a guy who moved to Japan to work on video games. He was the only American who flew from the US to join the company. I think he breaks through some common misconceptions that Japan is a nerd's paradise...afterall, Hello Kitty, anime, Gundam statutes, manga shops...all are rampant in Japan....but getting there to revel in all it's marvoulesness is...well...kind of a pain...

Can I visit you in Japan?

This is by far the most common question I get when I break news to people that I'm going to Japan. The answer is always OF COURSE! You can even stay with us wherever we end up putting down roots.

Please keep in mind, the part of Japan I will be living in is not a place you can decide on the spur of the moment you want to go to....to prepare you must:

1. Get a passport (duh)

2. Apply for a Japanese visitor's visa, which should be good for 30 days.

3. Make sure you have purchased or have travel health insurance!! (<-- this is important as often you will not be allowed on base unless you can prove you have this, also if you get hurt the Japanese and/or base hospital will not see you without it) -- Unfortunately, hospitals in this part of Japan have had a huge problem with visitors running out on their bills. So unless you can prove that you can pay, you most likely will not be treated.

4. Cash, cash, cash (in yen of course). Japan is a cash society. Not even McDonald's on base takes credit or debit cards. Which is strange to me since they are the originators of so much technology, you would think they would have changed to a cashless society. However, cash has some societal implications (that escape me) attached to it, so the Japanese continue to use cash.

5. Bring EVERYTHING you need with you. If you run out of your specialty American soap that you HAVE to use due to allergies, bring TWO of them so you don't run out. The base has a very limited selection. Visitor's who are not military are not be allowed into the commissary (which is the grocery store on base) and also may not be allowed into the NEX (the department store on base) depending on the security threat levels that day. Of course, Japanese grocery stores should have everything, but it may not be the items or brands you are used to. If you are a lady, bring your lady care items, even if you don't think you'll need them.

6. Bring walking shoes. You will walk a lot in Japan.

Pajama Jeans - The Long Flight Saviour

Here's the scenario - the flight to Yokosuka is about 13-16 hours long. Flying at any length leaves me rumpled, irritable, and with skin that feels like crunchy leather due to the extremely dry air in the airplane.

Most of the time when I'm hopping off a flight, it doesn't matter what I wear. I'm either seeing family, John, or Vegas (which is a 30 minute flight). However, coming into Yokosuka there's a chance one of the first people I will see will be one of John's co-workers. We'll go straight to base and will have a lot to do on our first day...and a lot of people to meet.

For me, jeans just aren't comfortable for a long flight. Sitting for long periods and snacking on salty foods whilst trying to limit my liquid intake so I don't have to make my way to the bathroom more than once leaves me feeling bloated. Jeans and bloating just won't work. All real jeans will accomplish is showing off the fantastic muffin top I have grown on my 13 hour flight. I usually opt for the black yoga pants, which are sweat pants in disguise. However, they are too casual for a "first day" impression. So I've opted to buy a pair of pajama jeans.

What are pajama jeans? They look just like jeans, but they fit like yoga sweats. Looking at the pictures on the internet you really can't tell the difference. Hopefully they work out. They're made of some denim cross over material and are supposedly as comfortable as sweats. So will these work? Will these make a great first impression or fool people into thinking I suffered a long flight in jeans? We shall see.

The Tools of the Move

First, make sure you have a folder in which to keep all important documents (birth certificates, marriage certificates, pet documents, health documents etc)

Make sure that folder has lots and lots of pockets for all of the important things you need to keep with you.

Make sure you're filling out all your documents on time as many need to be submitted a certain number of days before your arrival.

Lastly, you'll need a pet carrier that fits under the seat....he looks unhappy, but he did fit in this just fine. Ignore his pleading face.